FROM 150 WAYS TO TELL IF YOU'RE GHETTO

BY Shawn Wayans,Chris Spencer & Sali McCullough
You Know You're Ghetto if...

1. You put sugar on your frosted flakes
2 Your kids were in your wedding.
3 You call your mama by her first name.
4 You have a car phone and no car.
5 You iron dirty clothes.
6 You've been a guest on Ricky Lake.
7 You wear house shoes to the grocery store.
8 You're nineteen and you just met your father.
9 You use a clothes hanger as a TV antenna.
10 You have a wife and kids but still live at home.
11 You chew ice.
12 You cain't kant spell "can't."
13 You still wear anything that says "Whoop, there it
is."
14 You record over previously recorded tapes.
15 Your mom does your hair in the kitchen.
16 You don't pay your rent until you get a three-day
notice.
17 You put on panty-hose instead of shaving your legs.
18 You buy clothes for a party and return them to the
store the next day.
19 You only go to church on Easter and Mother's Day or
to meet women.
20 Your first name begins with Ta',La', or Sha'.
21 You took the batteries out of the smoke detector to
put in your pager.
22 Your bank is a check-cashing place.
23 You have to put stuff on layaway at the 99-cent
store.
24 Your man can wear his hair in a ponytail but you
can't.
25 You're hooked on ebonics.
26 You think putting batteries in the refrigerator
recharges them.
27 When you were little you had to be in the house
before the streetlights came on.
28 You take bubble bath with dishwashing liquid.
29 You return gifts for the money.
30 You yell "Pookie" in your house and five people turn
around.
31 You think going to prison is "keeping it real."
32 You save cooking grease.
33 The only dates marked on calendar are the 1st and the
15th.
34 Your mama whipped you and your friends.
35 You keep food stamps in a money clip.
36 You think grease and water make your hair curly.
37 You wear tube socks with dress shoes.
38 You add water to shampoo to stretch it.
39 You put you kids to sleep with NyQuil.
40 You use your welfare check as collateral.
41 You can read your haircut.
42 You use a toothbrush to style your "baby hair".
43 You named your daughters after cars you can't afford.
44 You bought your rims before you bought your car.
45 Your fingernails are longer than your fingers.
46 You think jury duty is a good way to make money.
47 You think going on a diet means no candy.
48 You have a drawer in your kitchen just for condiments
from fast-food restaurants.